When I’m in the Mood . . .

When I’m in the mood, I do like to knock out some of those loose ends. I just sent off an email with information about ordering private doodling sessions to a client. I got to include this new digitized version of a doodle signature I made one day while #doodlingwithstrangers.

Fun, right?

I’m on my checklist of my 10 minutes of three things today: cleaning, loose ends and meditation/rest. I have done 10 minutes worth of cleaning, though I feel inspired to do more. Wanting to get packed up to move in a few day so that I’m 1) not rushing on Monday morning and 2) not trying to do it in the rain. And I’d add 3) doing it when I’m inspired and not when I “have to.” Blech.

Loose ends: I’d say I’ve given 10 minutes to that today. I got to order and update the above doodle signature from Fiver.com. I also sent that email that I just mentioned. Surely that’s 10 minutes of loose ends. But what I still want to do in that department is spend 10 minutes looking at website templates to forward the Doodle Outreach site. So much is happening in the world of doodling, it’s high time to have a place to capture and share it all. I love these ten minute increments. They’re so doable!

Then, if all unfolds and I don’t do anything that’s likely to make me fall asleep and not want to leave the house, I’d like to wander down to South Austin to catch my friends Bobby Whitlock and CoCo Carmel play a little show late this afternoon. It’s always a high time for me to go and see them. I always feel loved and aligned. They reflect to me a commitment to each of our hearts and individual paths.

And will I write my 1000 words today? TBD. I like to allow myself a day off here and there, though as I’m typing this, I can feel I’m having a bit of a craving . . .

I read on an Abraham post today that when you have a craving and it feels good, go for it. If you have a craving and it feels bad, don’t.

Things to play with on this sweet Saturday.

I’m having the thought right now, “Who gives a hoot about your to-do list?” But I don’t care. It’s my bloggy. I get to put whatever I feel on here. 🙂

Love, love,

Happy for a Chill Day

A few days ago, while setting things up on my schedule, I purposely blocked today off. I wrote Artist Date across the day’s entry and didn’t allow anything else to get on it. I slept in for the first time in ages. I caught up on The Voice. I doodled. I made my one social media post today — announcing tomorrow’s Doodle Booth. I wrote my Morning Pages out here on the beautiful porch in the breezy, easily overcast afternoon. I wrote about 1400 words in my book, and I wrote about what a difference it was to be writing on this just grey, perfect temperature quiet afternoon in daylight on the porch versus when I’m falling into bed at night, squeezing the writing in because I’m committed to it, but it doesn’t get to be in the front row when I’m also teaching classes and Doodling with Strangers and facilitating Inquiry sessions and hosting private doodling classes and you know, living. The hustle, I sometimes call it. The working to get by. Like I said, not that I don’t love how I’m unfolding in time in this life and what work there is to be done. It’s just a different flavor of a day when the stuff that’s been squeezed into wherever it can fit gets to come out languidly and with a bit of daylight on it.

This morning I noticed what a strange feeling this was. To have no obligation for the day (although some niggling to-dos have been coming around, and maybe they’ll be for tomorrow. There’s definitely no forcing anything here today), and to have plenty of money for food, so no hustle like that necessary (if ever at all, and isn’t that the question?). What a relief! What a freedom. It’s been awesome, and I’m looking forward to a good dinner and a continuation of relaxation as the evening comes on.

But, yes, to get to do writing (or make art or make up songs or create puppets or write letters or simply look out from this second story porch to witness all of the arrayed bird life happening in the trees) without any strain or should or obligation choking back the energy: it’s just been awesome and enlightening.

Tired & Happy

Well, I trust my body’s wisdom!

I’m feeling maybe slightly under today, and I’m okay! I have a few errands I want to do and will take some vitamin C and be super good to myself and take a little rest when I get back home later. I don’t want to speak too soon, but I think I’m going out to see an awesome show tonight, so all the more reason to get some good rest while I can. (I heard this superstar played past midnight in Ohio last week!)

After I wrote my Morning Pages this morning, I took a little mini nap. It was great. I don’t always fall totally asleep, but I’m able to close my eyes and rest some, and that feels goooood.

Loving Affirmation: My body now restores itself to its natural state of health.

I love myself.

I love resting.

I love the Doodle Booth, whose amazing Saturday session we just finished.

I love the Trust Rest blog and love the touchstone of coming back here, again and again.

And now, I’m off to take care of business in the most restful way possible.

Love, love. xo

Trust in the Seasons

In this time of such high inspiration, I have ideas and visions pouring through. It’s so exciting and I feel so aligned: it’s a thrill. A blessing. A gift.

Meanwhile, for a few days, I’ve been feeling really sleepy.

Funny: yesterday I was on my good friend’s radio show (click here to listen to our conversation!). Prior to the show, I’d been feeling this tiredness and I rested a bit before joining. After the show, I was also feeling to rest, and even headed toward my bed. It was about 3:30 in the afternoon, and I felt to trust rest. Besides, y’all know that I feel great success if I lie down (screen free!) during the day. Extra bonus if I fall asleep.

Anyway, just as I was heading to my bed, I clicked to listen to the recording of the radio show from yesterday, and I felt so inspired by our conversation that I ended up putting on my sneakers and going for a walk while I listened.

I was  lit up and connected. I’m so thankful for the support that surrounds me and lifts me up.

The walk led me to some friends’ house where we all had a little fun and headed to dinner together. Since I’ve been obsessed with Indian food, I was extra happy that we went to good old Taj Palace and talked and talked and had a wonderful time.

Then, as they were dropping me off at home, the owner of the garage apartment where I’m staying stuck her head out the door and invited us all to join her and her partner for a nightcap outside in the beautiful back yard. So we all joined and had more wonderful uplifting and inspiring conversation, and I felt – again – so very supported, aligned, right on.

I finally came upstairs around 9:30; and to think, six hours earlier, I’d been headed to bed.

So here I am now. It’s 2:30. I have plans this evening for which I’ve wanted to reserve my energy. The front door is open to the local warmth. I’ve had a Doodle Booth today and have written Morning Pages. Not that there’s any should on any of it. This is just what’s been unfolding. I’d love both a nap and a walk. And a fresh juice. And did I mention a nap?

I had the thought today that I need extra down time. Like, thinking I need more than others. Well, who cares what’s happening with others? Or even compared to myself? Rest happens when it’s time to rest.

I just want to listen to the body extra, cuz I don’t want to push it too far when it’s not feeling so hot. Let it rest. Breathe the fresh air. Easily appreciate the largesse of this amazing life.

And daydream of the moment when this comes to fruition:

The prompt was: something you’re interested in doing and feel a little nervous about. I’ve been considering making and selling puppets since last year on the way to Maui when my flight attendant said, “You HAVE to make and sell these” when she met my puppet, Birthday Girl.

Resting is FOR SURE part of the creation process. Balance. The trees don’t have leaves on them right now, but they will come back. If the trees were blooming constantly, we’d all be sneezing so much, we’d never be able to do anything else! If I lie down, rest willing, I will also get up.

Deep Gratitude for Rest & Creating

Yesterday was amazing. Beginning the day knowing that I couldn’t possibly do anything wrong and sticking with that all day led to a glorious unfolding. Start to finish: awesome.

I woke this morning with some familiar worries and woes. I get bored of the same old same old. But I faced it, writing my Morning Pages, and was already feeling fresher by the time I finished. And some of the fog outside has burned off and I’m seeing sunshine, which always, always helps! I’m such a seasonally affected gal!

I had an interesting moment yesterday around wealth and abundance: I didn’t have enough money to pay for my acupuncture appointment that I had scheduled for yesterday, so I’d called the day before to cancel it. Then, yesterday, around the time that I would have been at acupuncture, in a dark room, having driven across town; I was instead on the porch in the sunshine in my swimsuit, writing Morning Pages, reading, and really getting that I was living the life of a millionaire. I was totally living my dream: ease, no place I had to be, creating at the rate I create, feeling good in my body, mind and spirit.

I feel so much gratitude that being true to myself is my only path.

Maybe I’ll always be unwinding the old voices. But I can see, with today as an example, that they don’t stick around so long. And I have spaces and methods to recognize and meet them and to allow them to move through.

So this afternoon in Doodle Booth, we made pictures of what we’re grateful for, after making a quick list of five things. Here’s how mine came out:

Yesterday, someone I only know through Facebook (and have only been connected with there for a short time) posted a video on my wall. She said her intuition just told her to, and her intuition was good. In this “long form” talk with Brene Brown and Chase Jarvis, I was affirmed — even further — at how aligned I am with my heart’s passions. These two talked about how there is research-based evidence that creativity is not only necessary, but also that the lack of using creativity is detrimental. I am so inspired and am so grateful that I get to be a channel for this important information. I’m also super grateful that my creativity is alive, alive, alive. I get that creativity is resting. I get that resting is creative. I get that humans are both craving to take a deep breath and rest and also to unleash their creativity.

I’m really, really fortunate.

All I know to do is keep stretching little bits in fresh ways and to keep following prompts from my heart. It all yields a deep sense of rest. I feel that the more I do my own work and the more I rest and stay open, the more I get out of my own way and this natural divinity simply comes through, unhindered

It’s amazing, and I’m deeply grateful. Did I mention that?

* * * * *

If you feel inspired by this exploration and would like to make a donation or contribute in another way, click here.
Thanks, always!

Wands and Not Worrying

I have a Doodle Booth coming up in about seven minutes, so this’ll be a quickie.

A sweet new friend was just up here chatting with me. She brought me a new magic wand! I’ll have to show you that.

She’s in her 60s, maybe early 60s, and we were talking about my life, my age, what seems to be up with me and what she hopes for for me. It was a good conversation because I feel she has so much gentleness. A really grounded and warm energy. So when she starts talking in practicalities, I’m not put off.

It was sweet. I love my new wand. She said we females tend to over analyze. I said, that’s what the wands are for.

Am I crazy not to worry? To simply feel that my life is coming together, moving along, as it is. That it is safe and will be safe?

In this dream, I’ve been doing a lot of looking into my life, my beliefs, my experiences. Treasuring many of them. Attempting to flush many others. Or maybe simply flesh out. Bring them all up into the light. Look at those words. Feel the feelings that come with them, and stay open. Rest. Now, where is the need to struggle?

I do expect the best. And, if I’m fully honest, I have my moments of worry/stress/am-I-always-going-to-be-like-this?

So what?

I looked over at my phone to pause Pandora, since I’m about to open up the Doodle Booth call. I had a notice from Instagram that someone had liked a picture of mine. I looked to see what it was, and it was synchronistic with what’s been on my mind today, and throughout this writing. It’s private and feels good to keep it in my heart. It is. I love. I wonder. I cry sometimes, if I’m lucky. I thrive. I rest. I experience stress. I make art. And now, I’m off to do just that. Love you. x

P.S. From Doodle Booth today: Non-dominant hand doodle of a message about something that’s really important to us. This is what came out.

No Hurry, No Worry

Photo Credit: http://rvnow.rvtravel.com/2009/08/no-hurry-no-worry.html

When you find yourself hurrying, stop . . .  – Wallace Wattles

Today I made an effort to do something that, in the moment, I was not feeling fully inspired to do. That is, it really felt like a chore. Not the entire thing. I had some moments of enjoying or okayness, but, man, it seemed like gearing up for it and getting through it took all day. It didn’t feel like a good use of my time/energy, once I finally had it done.

I just looked up the definition of hurry. The first listing says to carry or cause to go with haste.

I hurried (even though it seemed to take all day), out of some nervousness perhaps and also from some level of inspiration. I must have been guided somewhat, but I also knew that I was pushing something that felt uphill. It didn’t feel like a natural unfolding in the moment. It was more like, Bang this out so that you can get it off of your mind. I didn’t like the feeling that came with it.

So when I read this definition of hurry — to carry or cause to go with haste — the words “haste makes waste” came to mind.

For me, this means if I’m hurrying, I’m more likely to make a mistake or drop or break something and thereby slow myself down and take more time, not to mention the loss of whatever I spilled. Wasted time and materials.

In contemplating how I was feeling upon finishing my task today, I noticed that I had thoughts saying that didn’t seem like a good use of my time. Like the day was gone and what did I have to show for it? (Funny, as I’m reading over this now, at 10:00 at night, after I’ve now facilitated an LI session, written my Soul Pages and played guitar for a while, I’m glad to have the class announcement done. And I knew I would be, but still . . . )

I feel kind of split on it. The task today was getting a webpage set up and some emails and posts sent out for a class I’m offering for Valentine’s Day (Self-Loving through Creativity). I feel happy about the class, and I love the hands-on teaching moments, but I get bogged down in the administrative business anymore. My favorite part of the preparation today was doodling the process ahead of time. I doodled pictures of getting the computer work done easily. I created sold-out sections of both the in-person and pending on-line version of the class. And best of all, I created a picture of me with my happy participants.

It’s interesting to notice my feelings even as I typed that. I noticed feeling uplifted, lighter and more open, when I wrote about this last doodle. Amazing. And, yes, that felt like a really good way to spend my time today. In my Soul Pages tonight I wrote that I’m happiest when I’m making art.

So what of the other time? (Something good to do a little inquiry on: time/spending time/wasting time.)

I’m not used to doing much that I don’t feel inspired to do. I feel this is an on-going lesson and exploration. It’s part of the un-winding of beliefs and ingrained reality systems.

Because I’m more and more used to moving only with the gentle winds (or stronger, more obvious gales) of guidance, today’s experience of sort of pushing to stay with and on the task stood out for me.

I haven’t drawn any full conclusions, one way or the other. Which is all for the best anyway. One conclusion comes and goes just as the next. We can rest and watch them go.

P.S. Doodle Booth tomorrow (Wednesday)! Join us for good expressive fun!

Admit Not Knowing, and Rest

Photo Credit: Blessed Are the Weird FB page

I was in the bathroom a few minutes ago giving myself some mirror love. I wrapped up with saying, “I just don’t know right now.” Something in those words (and acknowledging them) gave me comfort. It’s not that I didn’t know about loving. It’s this other mystery . . . the mystery of what’s coming and how it’s going to play out . . . that I’ve been agitating over. Yes, I admit it. I have been feeling feelings, thinking thoughts, you know, human stuff. And, at the same time, it’s old news stuff. I was realizing today how these thoughts and this category of question (how, how, how, what, what, what, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh) has been playing out much longer than I’d been present to. I’m ready to start to ignore it, frankly.

Having said that, ignoring doesn’t always work, and I’m finding that acknowledging seems to make the difference. Not faking it. Not pretending it’s not arising. Not shoving aside the concern and applying a bandage of attempted good cheer on top of it. No, if something’s not passing, let me tell the truth about it. This thought is here. This feeling is like this. Let me open my body and rest and experience the movement of both thought and sensation. Now, is there anything else to be done? (A fun and inspiring little video on this topic is right here!)

After my lovely moment in the mirror, I took a moment to scroll my pages feed on Facebook. I haven’t been doing nearly as much mindless main feed scrolling, especially in these past few weeks since I’ve been in the Burn the Leash course. We’ve been invited not to look at the news during this stretch, so I expanded that (since I don’t look at much news anyway) to not leaving myself open to lots of other personalities and opinions as they appear in my Facebook feed. No offense to my friends. There’s just so much to sort through when I’m listening so closely for my own guidance. To be fair, sometimes it is reflected in something I see in someone else’s post, but I think you feel me.

For quite some time I’ve been feeling to take in less and less information from others and listen more and more to my own inner guidance. Not that I listen to much else overall, but the influence of the noise in my feed seemed significant enough to let it rest for a moment.

Anyway, I sometimes like to look at the pages feed because it’s comprised of pages that I’ve hand-picked to follow, and many of them are Rest and Creativity Encouraging. In the feed today, I saw both of the images I’ve displayed here. I see the theme. As if I didn’t already know.

I was guided (in my soul writing) to give myself an entire day off from worry and strategizing. Have I been successful? Well, I guess that’s in the eye of the beholder. I had a great Doodle Booth class that definitely shifted me from the old world analysis and fear-fueled strategies to a more open, restful and willing space.

The messages from the Soul Pages have been to rest, quiet down, and really train myself in receiving. I can tend to be masculine in my energy (go-out-and-get-it type vibe). I was raised by a single type-A dad after all. But I am a female, and I like to be in a more relaxed role (obviously, or I wouldn’t be writing this blog).

So I’m off to relax in my not-knowing. And I’m gonna take it easy today, just like I’ve been told. Love you. ❤

Photo Credit: Project Happiness FB page

* * * * *

If you feel inspired by this exploration and would like to make a donation or contribute in another way, click here.
Thanks, always!

Guidance to Resting

Here I am writing to you this morning from my bed du jour. I woke up this morning with some tummy ache and have been taking it easy, massaging some acupressure points and reading about Bali. Yesterday it occurred to me that Bali may just be the rest + creativity capitol of the world. So I’m doing a little feeling around.

Also yesterday, I got the strong guidance, once again, not to push anything and to rest. I have so many ideas coming through me all the time, and there is also the flavor of idea that’s lined with stress, either in the background or foreground. The what-if’s and hadn’t-I-betters and all that jazz. You even saw yesterday my looking for jobs — because that was how I was guided in that moment.

Last night as I was finally getting down to my soul writing exercise on the tail end of a busy day, I received the strong guidance to rest, rest, rest. Take a load off. Stop pushing. Don’t force anything. Move by instinct and not by fear. I’ve had some class ideas swirling around and wanting to further the ones I’ve already started. I get this mix of emotions: inspiration mixed with slight panic. Like, I fear that what I’m planning is my only source for survival. And if I was somehow clear that was the case, that I must do the thing I’m thinking of, maybe I’d be inspired like that, but I’m not. Not this morning, anyway, and not last night.

I’ve been so diligent these past few weeks. Doing the soul writing full-on, writing here, still writing Morning Pages like the loyal girl I am, pulling back from social media, exploring deeply in the new Burn the Leash course . . . I see how majorly, majorly important self-care, wellness and rest are while doing this sort of deep work. Today I’m having some over-due body work done. My shoulders have been barking for a few weeks now. Trying to carry things that don’t belong to me, perhaps?

Besides that, there’s nothing else I have to do today. I hope to get a little further in my Burn the Leash homework (creating a map of my Kingdom of the Past) and to feel well. And to rest. And to keep pretty quiet.

Seems as if there are some major shifts going on. It’s so personal, I don’t even know how to talk about it.

I’m thankful to be in a quiet and familiar place and to have the love and support of the Universe, today and always, as that’s what  I am. That’s what YOU are.

I hope, if you’re reading this today, that you, too, are encouraged to rest and to go with your deepest instincts, no matter what your conditioning might try to tell you to do.

Ooooh that sounds like a great Doodle Prompt. Maybe it’ll turn up in tomorrow’s Doodle Booth. Join us if you can!

Meanwhile, I’m resting with the Louise Hay affirmation for stomach upset. It’s perfect:

I am safe. I trust in the process of life to bring me only good. ❤

* * * * *

If you feel inspired by this exploration and would like to make a donation or contribute in another way, click here.
Thanks, always!

Still Resting First

I continue to be in the Rest First mode, carried on from yesterday. I have some ideas of what I’d like to do right now, or what I might do. Images appearing in the mind. Thoughts. But if I stay still and listen to my body, it seems to have different information. Rest. You will do the things as you do.

I continue to experience some unfamiliar physical symptoms that seem to just be moving from part to part. The ear is feeling a lot better, and now my digestion is feeling strange (x a few days). All I can figure is to take super good care, rest the mind, rest the body, join with the intelligence and brilliance of the body’s molecules, and eat cleanly and lightly. And rest some more.

. . .

and this is how it goes. I wrote the above and then ended up switching tabs and answering some emails and taking care of a bit of business. My tummy’s feeling better. I still feel tired and a little headachy, like I could sleep all day, but I don’t feel quite as yuck.

I have a Doodle Booth coming up in about 90 minutes. I do feel to rest.

It’s interesting to say, “I do feel to rest,” and then to close the computer, rest, and see what actually happens. Thoughts are not necessarily a predictor of actions, even though we imagine them to be.